Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Shallow crisis time

I have an intense love-hate relationship with my hair.
One of the biggest hate sticking points comes from a lovely little cowlick I have on my forehead hairline towards the middle. A 'widows peak' they call it. Anywhoo, this makes it hard to have bangs. One of the stylists I went to said he'd remedied that on one girl by shaving it and having the bangs fall over that spot. I don't know if anyone else does that and I don't know if I'm brave enough to shave a place on my head. So my way of changing my hair use to be to get bangs but since that is a bit more intense of a move, I'm pondering something else.
Now that I've given more information than anyone would ever want to know about my hair, I can get to the dilemma I have now. I want to cut it off. I'm sick of never having or wanting to take the time to do my hair to the point where it looks decent. So usually its throw into some sort of braid or just pulled back. So, I think I want to cut it. But I'm shallow still in some small way. The utilitarian in me says, 'yeah cut it off and be free-heck-shave it all off' and the vanity in me responds, 'do you really want people looking at you as one of those kind of people?'
So help a sister out: continue to have frumpy hair, grow it out and learn how to do it better, or chop it. Here are some pictures of some ones I like. The only problem is I'll have to figure out a work around for the bangs across, make them longer and swept to the side or find someone who will shave the cowlick.
Check 'em out:

Option 1:
Option 2:
Option 3:

Option 4:
Option 5: (the safe option)

Vote and tell me what you think! Then I can start to wonder about darkening it. I think I want to, but I don't wan to be tied to the cost to keep it up.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

Thoughts from the Shower

I was reading a post from an LDS blog my brother sent me a while back about how we teach modesty to young women in the church. I'm not sure I agreed with all the issues the author raised or agreed with her solution but it definitely got me thinking about some of my own 'tick inducing' teachings from my YW days. There is one in particular that has grated on me for some time but I could never exactly pin down what it was about it that bothered me.
Enter the shower.
I do a lot of my thinking in the shower. This morning I think I had a breakthrough.

I think I should preface this with a few disclaimers with the hope that I offend as few people as possible. If you still find yourself offended, please realize I am not so much concerned with some person as I am with a long-standing idea/way of teaching and the point of this post is certainly not to offend but rather to grabble with the idea and way of teaching. So, if for some reason you still find yourself offended, tell me and I'll make you cookies.

Disclaimer 1: I do not have any female children, however I have been around them and I am a female myself.

Disclaimer 2: I was never taught the idea I take issue with at home so I do not have experience with how it is taught in the home, so perhaps in the home its made more clear than in 1 hour lessons on Sundays.

So now that everyone is dying to know what I'm talking about and totally ready to be offended, lets do this.

I really, really find a frequent way of teaching about the temple to young women problematic. Here is how I reacted every time I heard temple marriage talked about in terms of castles and princesses before this morning's shower,

"No, the temple is NOT a 'castle' and you, young woman, are NOT a 'princess.'"

Then the more I thought about it this morning, I realized the problem, or reaction I had come to, ie don't call the temple a castle and don't call young women princesses, was also wrong because, while the temple still isn't really a 'castle' young women actually are princesses in a sense.

Alright then, what gives? Why still the annoyance with the teaching?

Because we teach girls they are princesses and then we don't teach them what a princess is. We leave that, very foolishly, to Disney or fairytales. We need to distinguish between what the world teaches about princesses and what the gospel teaches.*

Could we perhaps teach the relationship between the temple and their 'royal' responsibilities and inheritance a little more clearly and doctrinally? Could we teach them that the role of a princess and potential queen and priestess is far more similar to that of Ester-to rescue, to be courageous in the face of persecution and to follow God than it is of Cinderella-get a make over, fall in love, have the perfect castle wedding and live happily ever after? We could even talk about King Benjamin who worked all his days even as, or rather, especially as, king versus King Noah who did no work and glutted himself on the backs of the people. Could we teach them that what truly makes them a princess and potential queen and priestess is not looks, grace, charm or a 'prince charming' but their willingness to make and keep sacred covenants even when they feel and look more like Cinderella pre-makeover? Could we teach them that marriage in the temple is the beginning and not the culmination of their royal coronation? That there is learning to be done, stewardship to be justly, mercifully and righteously performed and covenants to honor?

I realize it is a lot to teach. I realize its much more of an investment than a few trite, sugary phrases left in the ears of our young women who then supplement them with worldly understandings and images from childhood. I realize that perhaps they won't understand it all at once. But wouldn't it be worth it to give them a foundation not just for temple marriage but for living life as one who has a temple marriage?

My main hope is that we consider how we as leaders of young women and parents to young women teach them about their royal nature and its relation to the temple. That we teach their temple marriage not as the culmination and crowning proof of their royalty but as the beginning of their learning, working and practicing how to become queens and priestesses so that one day they can be queens and priestess whose inheritance is eternal life, lives, and all the Father hath.

*Now, don't get me wrong, I have no problem with little girls playing Disney princesses. I do however have a problem with girls 18 and on playing Disney princesses.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Quick Update

We made it to California in one piece. Hooray.

The move was tiring like all moves are but we're really happy to have our things stored with my cousin in Henderson so our move into a place there won't be as long or as daunting. We even managed to unload our things on the coolest day of the week there.

Since then we've been trying to settle in to some kind of routine here in Apple Valley at my moms. It was a little difficult with the holiday weekend but I think we're getting there. The little surprise the AC pulled by breaking on Saturday was also a bit of a pain but luckily I am now typing from a nice air conditioned house and my mom no longer has an excuse to spray everyone with her spray bottle. I think she'll miss that part of being unbearably hot.

Henry has managed to spend lots of time with his uncles,Grammy, the Raffertys (family that lives here with my mom) and their dog, Dandy. I have even come up with a fantastic plan wherein the uncles take Henry once a week for 3 hours of 'Uncle time.' This Friday and Saturday will be the first run with uncles Aaron then Hamp, so if he manages to stay alive and in one piece, I think it'll be a success. What will I do with 6 hours this weekend? (Oh and don't worry uncle Jacob, being in LA will not exclude you from your turn ;-) )

Other than that, we've just been finding places for our stuff and figuring out what we want to do while we're here. Henry has been spending as much weather permitted time as he can in the yard and Johann's back to working on his thesis.

Overall I'd say it's going well so far. We're trying to make sure we don't go crazy all in one room and not having our own autonomous household. There are definitely pros and cons but we're trying minimize the cons as much as possible and enjoy the benefits to being here like having an in-house babysitter in my mom-yay for an easily planned temple night tonight. Everyone has been really helpful with making this transition as smooth as possible. Lets hope the one in a little over a month can go just as well.